Broken Shells

This is my weekly poem this week. I had the idea for the poem one day at school and went with it. I've posted two different versions of it (linebreak-wise); let me know if one is better than the other. I hope it works and I hope you enjoy it.

Broken Shells

Red-winged blackbird falling

out of the swarm above me,

spinning the way dark threads

unravel at a child’s tug,

calling with lullabies

and cries in C-minor,

your chicks fled the woven

walls of your nest and broke

their wings on my driveway.

My son buried them close

by beneath three pink stones,

smooth as their broken shells,

tangled in the bent twigs.

Those shells are inside now

on a crimson shelf where

he folds the blue blanket

his brother slept in twice

before he died. I thought

you should know: the sad songs

you warble and garble,

we sing with you, always.

-----------------------------------------------------

Red-winged blackbird falling

out of the swarm above me, spinning

the way dark threads unravel at a child’s tug,

calling with lullabies and cries in C-minor,

your chicks fled the woven walls of your nest

and broke their wings on my driveway.

My son buried them close by beneath three pink stones,

smooth as their broken shells, tangled

in the bent twigs. Those shells are inside

now on a crimson shelf where he folds

the blue blanket his brother slept in twice

before he died. I thought you should know:

the sad songs you warble and garble,

we sing with you, always.

--------------------------------------------

Obviously, this poem is fictional as I neither have children, nor have I had this experience in any way, other then to have found wounded or dead birds in general (generally more grown birds), but this is what came to mind. We'd also recently read a poem in class by Seamus Heaney called "Mid-Term Break" which deals with the death of a young brother. I realize it's hard to accurately write a poem from a point of view that I actually have little experience with, but this is my way of learning empathy - trying to understand how they feel and writing about it. Either way, I hope you enjoyed the poem. Let me know!